A blog about emotions, relationships, and what shapes our lives

Fewer men than women seek psychotherapy. This does not necessarily mean that men are doing better or have less need for support. Many seek help only when their difficulties have become difficult to ignore: when a relationship is at risk of ending, sleep is persistently disrupted, panic attacks have become overwhelming, anger is affecting other people, or work has become difficult to manage. Men’s reluctance to seek help is sometimes explained by saying that they do not want t

In my private practice, I meet clients who have previous therapy experience. They often have had 1-4 previous therapy contacts. Some contacts have been shorter, and some have been longer. The reasons for starting therapy differ, but their previous experience is the same. There was no desired change. What makes one therapy work and not another? The reason may be that the psychologist and the client have been focusing on understanding to a large extent. They have put the prob